"I'm Single and I know it"

"Ha? 27 na kayo tapos single pa? Mag-asawa na kayo ma'am!" pabiro na parang may halong pang-aasar ni manong taxi drayber habang binabagtas namin kabilang banda ng EDSA pauwi ng bahay. Mag-aalas nueve nang gabi.

Di ko alam kung papatulan ko ba si manong drayber sa sinabi nya pero buti na lang pagod na ako. Hehe! Pero sa awa nang Diyos ay kalmado ako. Sa kabilang banda, naisip ko, baka naman nagmamalasakit lang si manong drayber dahil sabi nya anim na ang anak nya at kahit daw mahirap ay sulit naman pag nakakasama nya ang mga anak nya. Sabi ko na lang, "Naku, hinihintay ko ang nilalaan para sa akin ng Lord." Pero hindi pa nakuntento si manong sabay hirit ng, "Nasa D'yos ang awa nasa tao ang gawa ma'am!" Pag nakatagpo ka nga naman ng pangungutsa, katakot-takot na self-control at patience ang kailangan. hehehe!

Honestly, I was half annoyed by his remarks but by God's grace, I was able to answer him calmly and objectively.  In this world's point of view,  a woman who is single and is getting older at the same time is not that of a very good idea. There are things like body clock, getting pregnant, giving birth and menopause in our long list of vocabulary. Things that most women get pressured of and/or worry about. At that time, my thought goes to 

the fact that I am more firm in terms of the reason why I am and choose to be single until God says so - obedience to God. And it is by faith that I am living in obedience to God.  Hebrews 11:1 says "Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see." 

As I meditate on the whole Hebrews 11, I realized that faith goes hand in hand with obedience. Faith is achieved to the fullest when there's total obedience.  The whole chapter enumerated notable people in the bible who had been known for their strong faith in God and His promises. And I was pleased to see women included on the list for their notable faithfulness:

• Sarah. "It was by faith that even Sarah was able to have a child, though she was barren and was too old. She believed[b] that God would keep his promise. And so a whole nation came from this one man who was as good as dead—a nation with so many people that, like the stars in the sky and the sand on the seashore, there is no way to count them." Hebrews 11:11
• Rahab.  "It was by faith that Rahab the prostitute was not destroyed with the people in her city who refused to obey God. For she had given a friendly welcome to the spies." Hebrews 11: 31

As I responded to manong drayber, I told him these:

• Even if we have the freedom to choose for ourselves, I believe that we still need God's blessings for if we deviate from His great plan and disobey there are consequences that come along instead of reward. 
• I am created by God to be pursued and not to pursue. It's man's role to search for me in God's time. If I push it and do it myself, I'll hurt myself for the 4th time.
• I made bad choices for myself before and since we're talking about marriage, I don't want to risk making another bad decision and suffer the consequences all the days of my life.

Let's face it. It's easier said than done to stay single and waiiiiiiit patienly and faithfully on God's plan. In my case, it takes alot of conscious effort to be reminded of my reasons to make that decision over and over again whenever circumstances require me.  I wrestle with God everytime I struggle on this. I plead that He will be gracious to me on things like these. I pray and pray until I overcome the urge to let my guard down. And it's only through Christ that I can do it because He overcome the world (John 16:33).

Yes, I'm single, getting old and I know it. And I also know that my obedience to God will never be in vain for He is sovereign and faithful God. Reading the whole chapter, I was delighted by "Women received their loved ones back again from death" (Hebrews 11:35) as if God was telling me a promise. hehe! And as I got off from the cab, manong drayber even said, "Naku ma'am! May irereto pa naman ako sa'yo, kaso takot ata yun sa babae! hehe!" Relieved as I was finally home I said, "Salamat kuya pero si God na bahalang magbigay sa akin nyan. Ingat ka sa biyahe."

" All these people earned a good reputation because of their faith, yet none of them received all that God had promised. For God had something better in mind for us, so that they would not reach perfection without us." Hebrews 11:39-40

All praise and glory goes to God!

Segue: Thank you for those who encouraged me to blog about my walk with Christ. You do not know how much you had moved me to write. Please don't cease to encourage bloggers like me. The more people write about their testimony of faith through Jesus, the more souls will be saved. All for Jesus!